Podcast Episode 162: When Praise Is Harmful to Children – A Your Child Explained Episode

Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll all the way down to the bottom of this post and hit the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!

Do you tell your kids how beautiful they are, or how smart they are? This past Tuesday’s conversation with Nicole Gardner reminded me once more how dangerous praise – at least the wrong kind of praise – is.

Read the show notes for today’s episode, about how to make sure you’re giving the right kind of praise (and not the harmful kind of praise) by clicking the link below…

You’ll also find an installment of my new YouTube video series, Parents Time-Out, that addresses this issue as well – if you’ve only got a few minutes, but you want to understand how praise can hurt, the video is the place to start.

Go to weturnedoutokay.com/162 to check it out, and have a great day!

It’s hard to believe, isn’t it, that praising a child’s beauty or intelligence could be harmful. But it truly is. It gives kids messages we don’t want them to have:

– it can make them second-guess their own judgment about their abilities
– it causes them to think extrinsically, only about what others want from them
– it makes them back away from tougher challenges (because they might fail at a tougher challenge, and lose your esteem for their intelligence)

Here’s the message we want to give kids instead: that hard work really matters, that sticking with the challenge until you figure it out is not only fulfilling, it’s fun!

Key Links:

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Click here to listen to my conversation with Nicole Gardner, episode 161 of We Turned Out Okay.

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