345: How to feel in control with Mom, Author, and School Counselor Phyllis Fagell, LCPC

 

I’m so excited to bring you today’s guest, Phyllis Fagell, LCPC, mom, school counselor, and author of the wonderful book Middle School Matters.

Phyllis helps us (yes – I include myself in here : )
– Pick our battles
– Talk with teachers and caregivers
– Figure out what we CAN do

In short Phyllis helps us feel in control of our family’s direction right now.
That’s SO important, given this extremely shaky start to the school year and our worries about the pandemic, downright silly politics, and the need for racial and social justice.
Not to mention our own need to pour from a full cup and not an empty one.

Given all that, I know you are going to LOVE our conversation!
You can find Phyllis, and all the wonderful work she does, by going to PhyllisFagell.com <3

Links that come up in today’s episode:

Because we’ve gone to and every-other-week schedule, in each episode I offer a back episode of We Turned Out Okay, something you can listen to in our off week!

Today, I bring you my first conversation with Raeshal Solomon, from episode 215. Raeshal single-handedly got herself out from under a mountain of debt, while living with a serious chronic illness. She’s a money expert, but more than that she is an expert in keeping going! I know you are going to love this conversation.
(Raeshal was also a part of OkayCon 2020, my Free Virtual Summit from this past March, right at the beginning of the pandemic. Click weturnedoutokay.com/328 for Raeshal’s wonderful contribution to OkayCon 2020.)

I’m excited to share, I will be part of the Reignite Toddler Play global virtual summit coming up at the end of this month! I don’t have the link yet, but as soon as I do I will drop it in here. Holly Peretz, the creator of the Virtual Summit interviewed me this past week and I just know you’re going to love this conference!

I’m spending September offering you HOPE…
– Click here to watch the first module of my premium “How to Keep Going” course, absolutely free, right there on the page.

– On that page you can also sign up to get the ENTIRE “How to Keep Going course, completely free! (You can also do that by clicking here.)

– “A life raft for families who are struggling to stay afloat.” That’s what Janine Halloran, LMHC, author of Coping Skills for Kids and Coping Skills for Teens recently said about my We Turned Out Okay Playbook. That is high praise indeed! Check out the Playbook for yourself by going to weturnedoutokay.com/playbook. You can subscribe for the October issue on that page, too!

In this post, called “A case study about handling epic tantrums,” I share the tools and strategies that a mom in our Ninja Parenting Community successfully employed to stop her four-year-old’s extremely epic tantrums.
If she can do it, so can you! Click here to learn how you can work with me, for free, for a whole month.

– Bruce Feiler’s wonderful book, Life is in the Transitions, comes up in our conversation today.

Click here to say hi in Instagram!… In Twitter… On the WTOO Facebook page… Or in the WTOO Facebook Group!

One thing I cannot live without

Hi Friends,

I’ve been working on the We Turned Out Okay Playbook now for many months, and Issue 1/August 2020 is finally out! [Enrollment for Issue 1 wraps up on 8/1/2020… Enrollment for Issue 2/September 2020 begins mid-August : ]
Go to weturnedoutokay.com/playbook for more information and to subscribe…
Also, there is a music component to the Playbook that I describe more in depth in today’s newsletter. So read on for that : )
______________________________________

This is the latest in my summer-long series, taking you on my journey of recovering from overwhelm and burnout and learning ways to sustainably keep going. Click here for the first installment, “Feeling guilty,” and click here for last week’s update, “What is in our control?”

This week, music is on my mind. Continue reading “One thing I cannot live without”

340: Navigating “Modern manners for Moms and Dads” with Evie Granville and Sarah Davis

Navigating social situations has only gotten worse in the pandemic – but it sure wasn’t always easy, even before!
Today’s guests, Evie Granville and Sarah Davis of the Modern Manners for Moms and Dads Podcast, have spent years helping parents navigate social minefields. With a book coming out in the fall and an awesome quiz that you can take right now (I did!), These two friends, educators, and parents have lots to contribute in helping us get along and raise our kids in these crazy times.
Listen to this episode to learn:
– how to navigate the toughest situations you might encounter
– how to understand your own approach to parenting
– how to shift that approach, if it’s not working as well as it could for you and your family

A few announcements
1. I share in this week’s preshow segment how frustrating I’m feeling, as a child-development expert, hearing from so many parents whose children are not doing well in the current educational climate.

I’ve got 3 ways to help if this is you!
Join my FREE Pandemic Back-to-School Challenge – enroll at the link below by Wednesday, July 22, 2020:
weturnedoutokay.com/pandemicchallenge

Try the Ninja Parenting Community (NPC), our online virtual coaching practice, where parents are getting much needed help navigating the start to this crazy school year.
Right now you can try the Community for just $1 for your whole first month! Click the following link for details and to join NPC:
weturnedoutokay.com/joinNPC

A new publication I’m creating, the WTOO Playbook! The August 2020 issue is jampacked with help and hope as you navigate the beginning of this crazy school year.
Join my newsletter group to find out more about the WTOO Playbook:
weturnedoutokay.com/weekly

2. We’re in the middle of a 10-week (free) newsletter series on how I’m overcoming my own burnout and overwhelm.
The most recent newsletter was all about how much better I felt coming from a place of kindness, rather than judgment.
Click here to read that newsletter and to sign up for future ones!

3. I’ve been invited to be part of the Mommy Matters Virtual Summit, the brainchild of next week’s WTOO guest, parent Coach, mindfulness expert, and yoga instructor Mariela Ortiz!
The Summit starts in early August, and you can sign up for it by going to:
Mommymatterssummit.com

Links Evie, Sarah, and I discuss are in the show notes, located at weturnedoutokay.com/340

Enjoy the show! Continue reading “340: Navigating “Modern manners for Moms and Dads” with Evie Granville and Sarah Davis”

Announcing the FREE Pandemic Back-To-School Challenge!

If the return to preschool/childcare/school is on your mind – and I know it is, because I’ve spoken with lots of you over the last few weeks – this FREE Pandemic Back-to-School Challenge will help you:

– Take on your biggest concerns about the upcoming year
– Manage your children’s behavior, and your own emotions, so you’re ready for the upcoming changes
– Learn the 3 Keys to Success for starting this year off right, even amidst all the uncertainty

You can do this, and I’m excited to help!
The challenge runs for four days from Thursday, July 23-Sunday, July 26.
Each day I’m sharing a video with participants as well as inviting questions and success stories…
Also participants get to be present for the Live Challenge Wrap up on Sunday!
And I’m doing something I’ve never done before in a challenge, handing out MVP awards!

I know we can start this year off on a positive note, regardless of whatever else is happening.

Prove to yourself that you can do it – join our challenge!

Click the following link:
weturnedoutokay.com/pandemicchallenge

Challenge starts Thursday, July 23.
See you then!

The real reasons to be kind instead of judgemental

This is the latest in my summer-long series, taking you on my journey of recovering from overwhelm and burnout and learning ways to sustainably keep going. Click here for the first installment, “Feeling guilty,” and click here for last week’s’s installment, “I didn’t think it was going to work, but it did.”

I want to talk about judgment this week, and its antidote, kindness.

Maybe at first glance it’s hard to recognize the juxtaposition of these two ideas, or even in recognizing it, to understand how one contradicts the other.

Listening to this week’s podcast episode, my conversation with wonderful therapist Shannon Connery, PhD, helped to crystallize this idea for me, because Shannon uses herself as an example, telling her story of casting judgment on someone in the grocery store, the mom of a small baby who wasn’t wearing a mask.

As she and this mom moved through the grocery store, Shannon felt judgmental about the mom’s choice to not wear a mask.

 

Shannon thought about all of the reasons why the mom should wear a mask, and made unkind conclusions about the fact that she wasn’t wearing one.

Then an elderly couple came toward them.

The mom whipped out her mask, and put it on at the last possible moment before encountering this couple, and suddenly Shannon understood:

The baby became super upset, screaming, and gesturing and reaching for that mask.

And the mom started to cry. Continue reading “The real reasons to be kind instead of judgemental”

339: How to keep going in this pandemic with Shannon Connery, PhD

I am excited to bring Shannon Connery, PhD, onto the show today, because she’s got lots of great ideas to help you keep going! (Click here for Shannon’s website, where you’ll find her podcast, her blog, and a wonderful free guide that she offers to help people overcome the challenges that we all have in our lives : )
Shannon is a therapist living in Colorado, and in our conversation today you’ll hear her story of losing nearly everything – and coming back stronger from that experience.
Shannon is also a podcaster, and her Fix Yourself is one of my favorites – she helps us all know what to do when we encounter difficult events and struggles in our lives. Shannon shares so much about herself, and her feelings, and what she’s tried that works to keep going and to help her family members and patients thrive.

Today we talk about:
– The role of empathy and positivity in helping you keep going
– Steps we are taking (and that you can also take) to dismantle racism
– What Shannon is doing to help those that she works with through the pandemic

Join us!

Video of our conversations – as well as lots of key links from this conversation – are available at weturnedoutokay.com/339

A couple notes from the preshow segment:
– Registration is now open for the private coaching practice for parents that I run (the Ninja Parenting Community), so you can join now if you need the extra help from a child development expert, and the support of a wonderful online community!
weturnedoutokay.com/joinNPC

– All throughout July I’m offering free live trainings, and even a free challenge! Get notified of these at the following link:
weturnedoutokay.com/weekly

Continue reading “339: How to keep going in this pandemic with Shannon Connery, PhD”

I didn’t think it was going to work, but it did

Hello! This is the latest in my summer-long series, taking you on my journey of recovering from overwhelm and burnout and learning ways to sustainably keep going. Click here for the first installment, “Feeling guilty.”

First of all, how are you today?
I hope you are hanging in there!
I’m still having good success with the subject of last week’s newsletter, feeling better now that I’m not “obsessively checking” the Internet.
I even noticed that my tendon disorder is better – my arms and hands bother me less – when I am not scrolling, pinching, tapping, or swiping.
(Click here to read last week’s newsletter, “The first thing that’s helping me overcome burnout and overwhelm”)

However, I do have a sore knee.
This started with a strengthening workout – my first in about three weeks. I should have remembered that I can’t jump in at full strength, after not working out for three weeks. But I didn’t remember.

I was midway into a hamstring exercise, when suddenly my knee was screaming. Continue reading “I didn’t think it was going to work, but it did”

The first thing that’s helping me overcome burnout and overwhelm

This is the latest in my summer-long series, taking you on my journey of recovering from overwhelm and burnout and learning ways to sustainably keep going. Click here for the first installment, “Feeling guilty.”

Hi Friends,

I’m still shocked and amazed by how much better I’m feeling, after a weekend of doing just one simple thing!
Well, simple to conceive… But not easy to implement.

If you remember, last week I sent a newsletter sharing that I was feeling incredibly guilty, overwhelmed, and burned out.

The first thing I did to address it:
I dropped off the Internet.

Not completely – but almost.

What that mostly meant was I didn’t “obsessively check.”

(I decided to leave off what I’ve been obsessively checking… because, while I obsessively checked some things, yours may be different. But the point is we are all obsessively checking something. What helped was cutting that out!)

I can’t tell you how much better I felt, not obsessively checking. Continue reading “The first thing that’s helping me overcome burnout and overwhelm”

337: Addressing our own burnout, AND beloved parenting author Audrey Monke is my guest today!

As a child development expert, I want to help you keep going in our new reality!
This conversation, recorded during March 2020 (in other words at the very beginning of the pandemic here in the US), I know will be super helpful for that.

I am excited to bring you my conversation with the author of one of my favorite parenting books (it’s called Happy Campers) – Audrey Monke of sunshine-parenting.com is today’s OkayCon 2020 guest!

Audrey shares:
– How to stay positive, even while everyone is cooped up together
– Some great family-focused activities you can do to make your stuck at home time more enjoyable
– What lessons Audrey, her family, and counselors and campers (who attend the summer camp Audrey owns and runs) are learning from this time

Learn how to keep going:
In my (free) Weekly Parenting Newsletters I am taking you on my journey of recovering from burnout, exhaustion, and huge feelings of guilt.
I am working to feel at peace with myself – to keep going, raising my kids, keeping our household running, and feeling happy inside – and if you want some tools to help you accomplish those miracles, click this link! Weturnedoutokay.com/weekly

NPC Summer Camp registration ENDS Wednesday 7/1
One way parents have been feeling way better, recovering from exhaustion, handling their kids’ fears, clinginess, and potty training issues: the Ninja Parenting Community.
Get access to everything in the community and enjoy a summer camp program created just for you, if you are looking for connection and positivity in our new reality!
I am closing registration to NPC on Wednesday, July 1 at 9 PM EST – enroll today, and take that first step toward being able to feel at peace with yourself and (sustainably) keep going!
Here is the link, jump in while there is still time:
weturnedoutokay.com/joinNPC

(go to weturnedoutokay.com/337 for notes to this episode)
We will get through this together!
Cheers –
Karen
Continue reading “337: Addressing our own burnout, AND beloved parenting author Audrey Monke is my guest today!”