Podcast Episode 184: Three Steps to Handling Homework Woes – Part 2 of the Back-to-School Guide

Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll all the way down to the bottom of this post and hit the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!

If you’re struggling with back-to-school time, or starting-school time – I’m creating shows this month and next to help you feel better.

Today’s is all about homework.

Over the years I’ve had parents share the most horrible stories about homework and their little kids, like the mom whose six-year-old received an afterschool detention for missing four homework assignments in a row.
That one still makes me choke a little.

Or the one about a child forced to miss recess because of a parent’s failure to log in and do the required “family homework.”

When medical ethicist Dr. Arthur Caplan comes on this show and says “recess is a right,” as he did in this episode last spring, I smile at his words.

But my blood pressure goes up.
Way up, at the thought of you and your young son or daughter coping with outrageous, damaging policies like these.

So today I’m taking everything my own training and experience tells me, and everything the wonderful teachers and doctors and folks who really understand young children (and who’ve spoken up on my show) – and I’m boiling it down into three steps to help you handle crazy homework demands.

Go to weturnedoutokay.com/184 for key links, and to read an outline of the three steps.
Also – Click here to sign up to join the Streamline Your Mornings Free 5-Day Challenge, which I’m offering again in early October! Continue reading “Podcast Episode 184: Three Steps to Handling Homework Woes – Part 2 of the Back-to-School Guide”

Podcast Episode 158: “Recess is a Right” – Speaking with Medical Ethicist Dr. Arthur Caplan about things that affect our children’s lives

Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll all the way down to the bottom of this post and hit the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!

Today’s guest, a medical ethicist (in other words, a person who helps determine what is ethical in people’s health), took my breath away with his eloquent words on stuff that impacts young children every day.

Dr. Arthur Caplan, professor of bioethics in the Department of Population Health at NYU’s Langone Medical Center, and I talk about everything from cloning mammoths to stopping malaria and the Zika virus… and also what the average person can do to improve their – our – lives.

Dr. Caplan shares his strong feelings on the academic pressures placed on elementary school age kids today, and what he says sure gives me hope.

I know you’re going to love our conversation! To read the notes, and to grab the key links, visit weturnedoutokay.com/158.

 

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With littles, meltdowns are hard to avoid.

So I came up with the HEART method to help you:
– remain calm
– stop worrying about judginess with public tantrums
– know you’re not alone

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Continue reading “Podcast Episode 158: “Recess is a Right” – Speaking with Medical Ethicist Dr. Arthur Caplan about things that affect our children’s lives”

144: Homework Troubles – How to Help When Your Young Child Struggles With Homework, A Your Child Explained Episode

Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll all the way down to the bottom of this page and hit the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!

A few weeks ago, in episode 140, guest KJ Dell’Antonia dropped so many knowledge bombs that I knew we’d need more than one Your Child Explained to really comprehend them all.

Here’s part 2 of 3 – all about homework and how to intervene when your child can’t take anymore!

Click weturnedoutokay.com/144 for show notes, links to last fall’s homework episode and conversation with the president of the American Academy of Pediatrics – and to sign up for the free, live NPC FAQ Q&A I’m hosting Thursday night, March 30 at 8 PM EST (where you can grab your free copy of Positive Discipline Ninja Tactics, the book that helps you handle every challenge your kids throw at you!)

 

Get a FREE copy of the book that helps you simultaneously raise kids and stay sane!

What: I’m hosting a live Q&A about the Ninja Parenting Community (not coincidentally, built to help you simultaneously raise kids and stay sane : )

When: Get your questions answered – and get your free copy of the book – on
Thursday, March 30, 2017 8 PM EST

How: Sign up just by clicking the button below!
Click Here to Register

 

KJ shared some great advice advice about intervening on behalf of your child.

She suggests “going in with your observations… and a question.”

Today we talk about making those observations – and what the question should be.

– The observations must take place over time, a day or two of your child having a meltdown over homework won’t be enough. KJ recommends getting the meltdowns on video if possible, so your child’s teacher understands what’s really going on at home about homework.

– The question must be some version of “how can we work together to solve this problem?”

Sometimes the teacher-parent relationship can seem very adversarial. If you want to help your child through her homework struggles, you need to find a way to work together with the teacher.

Questions or comments about today’s episode? Drop me a line at weturnedoutokay.com/contact!

Key Links:

Listen to my conversation with KJ Dell’Antonia, episode 140, by clicking here.

Click here to listen to episode 106: Join the Homework Revolt!

Click here to listen to episode 107, my conversation with American Academy of Pediatrics President Dr. Benard Dreyer.

Click here to find out more about the Ninja Parenting Community, the place where I work closely with moms and dads just like you to handle their kids’ bad behavior, advocate for their children, and overall be happier in parenting.

Trouble with tantrums?

With littles, meltdowns are hard to avoid.

So I came up with the HEART method to help you:
– remain calm
– stop worrying about judginess with public tantrums
– know you’re not alone

To calmly, decisively handle every on of your child’s tantrums, click the button below!

Click Here to Get the Guide

140: How to Be Happier In Your Parenting: A Conversation with Mom, Author, Columnist and New York Times Contributing Editor KJ Dell’ Antonia

Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll down to the bottom of the page and click the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!

Today’s guest didn’t set out to be a writer. But after getting her law degree and being a practicing attorney for six years, she made a discovery: law just wasn’t her thing; instead, she found, she was a writer.

In the spirit of finding stuff out through writing, KJ Dell’Antonia began freelancing about motherhood; she’s written for Slate magazine, Parenting magazine, Parents magazine, and many others. She is now a contributing editor and columnist on the Well Family page at the New York Times, and currently on book leave to write – what else? – a book that’s going to help us be happier in our parenting.

KJ shares where her research for this as-yet-unnamed parenting book is taking her, and you’re going to be thrilled because she’s investigating all the problems that you are most likely currently living with!

To find out how to handle getting your kids to do more around the house, how to help with homework, and how to be a part of KJ’s chores project (i.e.: getting your kids to do more chores) click weturnedoutokay.com/140!

Today’s episode is brought to you by the Ninja Parenting Community:

Do you struggle to manage your child’s behavior at home?
Is she in trouble at school or child care?
Is he starting to think of himself as a “bad kid” – even though you know he’s not?

Get the expert advice, training courses, and support you need

To help your children, but especially to help yourself.
The Ninja Parenting Community teaches moms and dads just like you to get into their best parenting mindset and thus be happier, less stressed, and more confident in parenting and beyond.

Click here to learn more about the Ninja Parenting Community, and start worrying less and enjoying more at home!

Guess what the vast majority of parents struggle with on a day-to-day basis?

KJ’s done extensive research on this, even commissioning a study with 1000 parents, for her upcoming book.

Her research shows that most parents struggle with one concept:

Discipline.

(I know… It sounded familiar to me too.)

Today, KJ shares how discipline wends its way through everything else in our parenting lives: chores, homework, consistency.

KJ is currently running a free project for parents (herself included : )
Click here to see what it’s all about!
Also! In our conversation today I bring up the concept of not moving kids’ walls… And KJ honored me by using this concept in week three of her chore challenge! Click here to read more : )

You can also find KJ:
on instagram here; and on twitter here.

She’s really fun to connect with out in the social media world, and not just for the adorable and funny Playmobil pictures she posts!

Click here to check out Positive Discipline Ninja Tactics: Key Tools to Handle Every Temper Tantrum, Keep Your Cool, and Enjoy Life With Your Young Child in Amazon; you can even read the introduction for free to determine if my book will be helpful to you.

106: Join the Homework Revolt

Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll on down to the bottom of this post and hit the triangular “play” button.

Notes on today’s episode:

Do you worry that your child is getting too much homework for his or her young age?

Do you stress out over the nightly fits as said homework is being accomplished?

Then, you’re going to love today’s episode – it turns out that homework and young children do not mix, and this fall people are standing up and saying “I’m protecting my kid from the scourge of homework!”

For key links and expanded show notes about how to join the revolution, click weturnedoutokay.com/106!

Recently I read a news story about Brandy Young, a second-grade teacher in Texas who sent a wonderful letter home with her students their first day. In part it reads:

“There will be no formally assigned homework this year.… Research has been unable to prove that homework improves student performance. Rather, I ask that you spend your evenings doing things that are proven to correlate with student success. Eat dinner together as a family, read together, play outside, and get your child to bed early.”

For my oldest, homework in kindergarten and first grade caused a huge amount of daily stress. Max lost twenty percent of his body weight in first grade, was diagnosed with migraine by six years old, and had the most horrible night terrors most nights of the school year (if you’ve listened to my show for more than three minutes, you know this… You also know how painful it was to watch him go through this, and how helpless Max’s dad and I felt during those years.)

I wish I’d had the guts to stand up and say “no.”

Today, I’m encouraging you to take a stand for your child.

In Ms. Young’s letter, she encourages parents to eat dinner together, read together, etc. – because those activities are “proven to correlate with student success.”

And I agree, student success is important. But it’s not the most important reason to reject homework and do these other things instead.

The most important reason, I think anyway, is that spending time with our kids and supporting them is fun! It helps everybody be happier, it helps the family unit be more cohesive.

So, how do you join in, how do you tell your kid’s teacher that you reject homework?

The news story that I read quotes a personal hero of mine, Alfie Kohn, early childhood expert and a man who hates homework so much he wrote a book about why it stinks.

Mr. Kohn states: “talk to each other and organize a group of ten or so parents. Walk in with a story about your child and say, “I’m very sorry, but we will not be participating in a homework program.” The bottom line is – what happens in the evening is for families to decide, not schools. Respectfully, we say no, and we opt out.”

How does homework affect your life and the life of your young child?

Please share – go to weturnedoutokay.com/contact – or comment, or ask questions, about this all-important issue that affects so many young children.

Key Links:

Worried about how to bring that all-important reading time into your busy week? Click here to grab my guide to creating happy readers!

Click here to read the Boston Globe article about the homework backlash.

Check out Alfie Kohn’s book, The Homework Myth, by clicking here.