My brother and I were kind of mortified about the party barge – until we got on it and had a ball… Which has absolutely nothing to do with today’s story!I just love this picture of my Mom. My brother looks adorable too.
Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll all the way down to the bottom of this post and click the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!
The story I tell today really happened. The year I was nine, we headed up to Montréal from our home in New England to spend the Christmas holidays with our extended family as usual.
But this trip was anything except for “usual!”
It took us more than 54 hours to complete the trip – which normally takes 8-hours – and included many harrowing moments as my mom tried desperately to get herself and us 3 kids safely to her
The good old Ford Country Squire! Here we are camping – my Dad, my brothers, and me (Mom took the picture.)
once-a-year time with the family she loved and missed so much.
Click weturnedoutokay.com/127 for links to WGBH studios – where I was invited to tell this story live on stage – and to Mass Mouth, the awesome Massachusetts storytelling organization!
Key Links:
Click here to go to WGBH, and here for Mass Mouth.
Are you feeling overwhelmed in your parenting?
Check out the Ninja Parenting Community, for expert advice about how to handle anything your kids throw at you!
We’ve got training courses – like the Sanity With Kids course, about staying sane even while raising kids – exclusive members-only calls, vibrant forums, and lots of ways to feel better.
Click here to check out the community, I hope to see you in the forums!
Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll all the way down to the bottom of this post and hit the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!
Today I’m asking the question: “what matters most… To your kids?”
It’s something I’ve been thinking about since speaking with Jonathan Fields, this past Tuesday’s guest.
Through his Good Life Project podcast, Jonathan has been a HUGE mentor of mine. Tuesday we found out who some of Jonathan’s mentors are; one turns out to be Milton Glaser, a man who helped Jonathan realize the value of structuring your life so that you prioritize the things that matter most.
What mattered most to Jonathan: time with his wife and their daughter.
This dovetails nicely with what matters most to our kids: it’s the time we spend with them.
Key Links:
Listen to my conversation with Jonathan Fields, episode 125, by clicking here.
Grab Jonathan’s book, How to Live A Good Life, in Amazon by clicking here.
If you’re struggling with the day-to-day of child-rearing, my book might save you some stress:
click here to check out Positive Discipline Ninja Tactics: Key Tools to Handle Every Temper Tantrum, Keep Your Cool, and Enjoy Life With Your Young Child.
Are you feeling overwhelmed in your parenting?
Check out the Ninja Parenting Community, for expert advice about how to handle anything your kids throw at you!
We’ve got training courses – like the Sanity With Kids course, about staying sane even while raising kids – exclusive members-only calls, vibrant forums, and lots of ways to feel better.
Click here to check out the community, I hope to see you in the forums!
Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll down to the bottom of this post and hit the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!
I’ve been a huge fan of Jonathan Fields’ Good Life Project podcast for over a year now; the guests, subject matter, and message have been instrumental in my life and We Turned Out Okay .
So, when Jonathan accepted my invitation to come on my show, I did a happy dance! (I was already doing one anyway… Jonathan’s book, How to Live A Good Life, came out right around the time of our conversation : )
If you’re trying to figure out how to survive these next weeks – if you’re feeling overwhelmed, and not as joyful as the season suggests you should – you are going to love the show.
Also – are you feeling overwhelmed in your parenting?
Check out the Ninja Parenting Community, for expert advice about how to handle anything your kids throw at you!
We’ve got training courses – like the Sanity With Kids course, about staying sane even while raising kids – exclusive members-only calls, vibrant forums, and lots of ways to feel better.
Click here to check out the community, I hope to see you in the forums!
The Good Life Project podcast is so-called because, Jonathan shares today, life itself is an ongoing project. We don’t get to a point where it’s the best life it will ever be, and then coast on that forever – we need to take small steps, frequently, toward that good life.
Jonathan shares about what it was like to sign a lease on premises to start a yoga studio in Manhattan… As the new dad to a three-month-old daughter… On September 10, 2001. We talk a lot about how truly life-changing 9/11 was, our mutual feeling of worrying in the aftermath about bringing up children in this new normal, and the good that Jonathan was able to bring about in New York itself through the yoga studio.
As we dig into holiday insanity and how to avoid it, the phrases “mindfulness” and “being in the moment” come up, as Jonathan shares that the same things that will help you live a good life in general also help in coping with holiday insanity.
It’s not every day you get to ask a mentor how to live a good life, and that’s what makes today’s show so special; I’m so grateful to Jonathan Fields for sharing his insights and ideas with us!
Trouble with tantrums?
With littles, meltdowns are hard to avoid.
So I came up with the HEART method to help you:
– remain calm
– stop worrying about judginess with public tantrums
– know you’re not alone
To calmly, decisively handle every on of your child’s tantrums, click the button below!
Click Here to Get the Guide
Key Links:
Jonathan’s book, How to Live A Good Life, could be just what you need to thrive despite the insanity; click here to check out both The Good Life Project podcast and this book!
During our conversation, Jonathan shares an episode of Good Life Project that stands out for him: his conversation with Milton Glaser which helped Jonathan restructure his life to include more of his top priority, family; click here to listen to that episode.
If this is what you’re worried about at holiday gatherings this year, you’re not alone.
Welcome! To listen to today’s show, scroll on down to the bottom of this post and click the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!
I’m cranking up the mic for two reasons today:
1) listening back to episode 123, where Ninja Parenting Community member Sabrina shared her concerns about holiday overwhelm and helping her girls handle gift-giving, I wanted to create something to help you if you’re facing those same problems…
So, I did! Download the FREE 3 Principles of Kids and Gifts if you want help:
– cutting through the gift giving insanity and overwhelm
– finding solutions that work for your whole family – including you.
– Truly enjoying celebrations, with less stress
Click this link to download them today and make the most of the season!
2) an article I read in the paper today, two Saturdays before Christmas eve, really got me thinking about a problem unique to the family gatherings we will all be attending this year. The article reads in part:
“But some non-Trump voters are not yet in a place where they can joke.
That includes [a Dad who shall remain nameless, because he represents a great many people listening today] and his family. This year they will not go to his wife’s great aunt’s Christmas gathering, in large part for fear of an argument breaking out in front of their 6-year-old daughter.
“She doesn’t understand why people like this person, said [this Dad], referring to Trump, “and to explain to her that people in her own family like this person – it would be a lot for her to process.”
– “Can The Holidays Be Happy?” The Boston Globe, Saturday, December 10th, 2016
In the wake of that article, I’m wondering: how are you?
Are you worrying about attending family gatherings this year, when it all feels so contentious?
I really hope this episode helps you, if that’s the case. Click here to get the full show notes and key links!
Here are several points to ponder as you make your decision about going to these gatherings, or bringing your kids:
– first of all, there may not even be any arguments.
I’m a worrier myself, and I’ve worked hard to surmount the idea of worrying about something that has a not even happened yet.
Today I’m asking you to do the same – don’t avoid holiday parties due to a fear of arguments breaking out.
Instead, handle them as they happen, because they may not even happen!
– if there are arguments:
1) Model respectful disagreement for your son or daughter.
Walk away from someone who’s pushing you toward an argument, do not engage. And while you’re not engaging, continue to treat that person respectfully.
2) Know that your child need not be involved in the argument.
Please shelter kids from adult concerns; they do not need to know the political affiliations of all your relatives.
3) Put yourself into the shoes of your disagreeing relatives.
Ask yourself: why might they feel that way? What fears do they have that they go to bed with every night that cause them to vote in such an opposite way from you?
If their views are truly anathema to you – you’re a firm believer in sparkly holiday sweaters while they favor Aran cable-knit fisherman’s sweaters, and no amount of persuasive discussion will change that crazyballs idea – feel free to avoid them (while treating them with respect!)
But more likely, it’s not that cut-and-dried.
More likely, they go to bed with the same worries and fears for their kids and our world as you do.
If you feel like that’s the case, in my experience that makes you a little less far apart on whatever spectrum you’re considering, political or religious, organic versus not organic, paleo versus vegetarian, decaf versus hi-test.
I always end up realizing, when I try to view the world through someone else’s shoes, that we are closer than I originally thought.
I hope you feel the same, and that this episode helps you stress a little bit less over the holidays!
Key Links:
Here is the Boston Globe article that started me thinking about extra stresses on families during this particular holiday season.
Are you feeling overwhelmed in your parenting?
Check out the Ninja Parenting Community, for expert advice about how to handle anything your kids throw at you!
We’ve got training courses – like the Sanity With Kids course, about staying sane even while raising kids – exclusive members-only calls, vibrant forums, and lots of ways to feel better.
Click here to check out the community, I hope to see you in the forums!
Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll all the way down to the bottom of this post and hit the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!
Recently I did an episode called How to Help Kids Cope with Anxiety Over New Situations, episode 117 – and it got near-record downloads.
In episode 117, we helped Melissa figure out how to help her kids handle new situations better – and even how to handle new situations better herself.
(Episode 117 is a recording of a coaching call with a Ninja Parenting Community member – if you want to become a member of our community and get all your parenting questions answered, click here.)
The amount of downloads made me realize something: Melissa is not the only one listening with some anxiety over new situations!
Today, I dig into the idea of anxiety, especially when travel and extended family are involved.
Recorded in December, I hope this episode helps you prepare for year-end gatherings and holiday celebrations.
If you’re listening after the holidays, it will still be helpful because new situations happen all the time, we parents often expose our kids to new situations, even outside of this season.
Click weturnedoutokay.com/124 for full show notes and key links. I hope this episode helps you!
How do we handle this type of situation – the crowded dining tables, the meals that last for hours, extended car or airline travel, sleeping in unfamiliar spaces such as hotel rooms or Grandma’s den?
Today, I propose that we focus on something that may seem a little counterintuitive:
empathy.
Taking on our children’s perspective can be so helpful, especially when strangers/friends/extended family are exerting pressure on us.
If you’re getting criticized for giving your toddler avocado at the Christmas dinner table; when your dad mentions “you weren’t this whiny when you were small;” I’m sure you can think of a few occasions where something similar has happened to you – focusing on your child’s needs and tuning all that out is key to getting through the tougher parts of unusual situations with your child.
Having been there myself, I know that it’s pretty tough in the moment!
But it gets easier, and often your relatives end up having a grudging respect for you simply because you’re doing what your child needs.
I leave you today with a great piece of advice:
Think like a grandparent.
Think: “will this really matter in a decade?”
The negative stuff – remark from the peanut gallery, whining and other stresses – falls away (if we let it).
What we’re left with our great memories of the good moments; I share a few of my favorite “good moment” stories today.
Wishing you well as you go out and make your own “good moment” stories!
Key Links:
The original How to Help Kids Cope With Anxiety over New Situations, episode 117, is available here.
Think like a grandparent – the best advice ever – originally came from We Turned Out Okay guest Daniel Wolff. Click here to listen to my conversation with Daniel!
Are you feeling overwhelmed in your parenting?
Check out the Ninja Parenting Community, for expert advice about how to handle anything your kids throw at you!
We’ve got training courses – like the Sanity With Kids course, about staying sane even while raising kids – exclusive members-only calls, vibrant forums, and lots of ways to feel better.
Click here to check out the community, I hope to see you in the forums!
Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll down to the bottom of this post and click the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!
Today, Ninja Parenting Community member Sabrina shares about the concerns she’s having right now: how to manage her children’s expectations, everyone’s feelings of overwhelm – and balancing her own needs with the needs of her family.
Recorded in early December, Sabrina has both a daughter’s birthday coming up as well as the busy and overwhelming-in-and-of-itself holiday season.
Sabrina got to have this conversation with me because she is a member of our Ninja Parenting Community.
If you want my help sorting out your toughest parenting issues, you should join too!
We’ve got training courses – like the Sanity With Kids course, about staying sane even while raising kids – exclusive members-only calls, vibrant forums, and lots of ways to feel better.
Click here to check out the community, I hope to see you in the forums!
“I’d like to know about how to set expectations with kids. It was great traveling last year because we could keep presents to a minimum. I’d much prefer giving them an experience, or donating to kids in need, than buying lots of presents. I realize though, that seeing lots of presents under a tree is part of what makes Christmas magical for kids. Amy’s birthday is the week before Christmas, so we have a double whammy!”
During our call, this caring mom shared about a feeling that many of us experience at this time of year: how to balance our wants and needs with those of our kids and the rest of our family.
Specifically, for several years now Sabrina has sacrificed her ideals of how to decorate for Christmas, giving in to what her two young girls want.
It may not seem like a big deal on its face. But during the whole Christmas season, Sabrina’s every day visual and kinesthetic needs are not being met!
We talk about how to bring that up within her family, and also about how to make family time during this season emphasize quality time, how the traditions that Sabrina’s family has built up over the years truly make this season a great one for raising children.
Trouble with tantrums?
With littles, meltdowns are hard to avoid.
So I came up with the HEART method to help you:
– remain calm
– stop worrying about judginess with public tantrums
– know you’re not alone
To calmly, decisively handle every on of your child’s tantrums, click the button below!
Click Here to Get the Guide
Key Links:
Sabrina’s book, Hannah and Amy Go to Peru, is the first in her series about the year that Sabrina and her family traveled the world. Click here to check out the book in Amazon!
Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll all the way down to the bottom of this post and hit the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!
Are you feeling overwhelmed in your parenting?
Check out the Ninja Parenting Community, for expert advice about how to handle anything your kids throw at you!
We’ve got training courses – like the Sanity With Kids course, about staying sane even while raising kids – exclusive members-only calls, vibrant forums, and lots of ways to feel better.
Click here to check out the community, I hope to see you in the forums!
You may know Jocelyn and Shane Sams from their entrepreneurial podcast, Flipped Lifestyle… “Where Life Always Comes Before Work.” This fun and inspirational couple has figured out a way to make their living online, thus spending more time on the important stuff – like raising their 7 and 5-year-old kids!
Today’s conversation does not get into entrepreneurship at all, except in talking about how this duo functions as a team – without, in their words, “killin’ each other.”
It does, however, share Shane and Jocelyn’s best tips for enjoying your relationships – with work, family, and those closest to you.
Our conversation is in turns hilarious (as in when Shane describes his “safety wipe” potty training method), and tender (I nearly named this episode “love is a verb,” I was so moved when Shane and Jocelyn brought up this concept.)
Go to weturnedoutokay.com/122 for full show notes and key links – and enjoy listening. I know you’re going to love this one!
S and J – as those of us in their awesome community frequently refer to them – share several great ideas today to help you really enjoy, not just the every day, but holiday time as well:
1) Think experiences, instead of “stuff,” when giving gifts.
This year the Sams children will receive season passes to an amusement park, bringing huge savings and repeated joy for the whole family.
2) Remember, as S and J’s minister says: “love is a verb.”
It’s the actions we take with our families and friends and loved ones that communicate how much we love them.
3) Work as a team.
So much is easier when there’s more than one of us, working together!
Trouble with tantrums?
With littles, meltdowns are hard to avoid.
So I came up with the HEART method to help you:
– remain calm
– stop worrying about judginess with public tantrums
– know you’re not alone
To calmly, decisively handle every on of your child’s tantrums, click the button below!
Listen to How to Work Together Without Killin’ Eachother by clicking here.
If you’re struggling with the day-to-day of child-rearing, my book might save you some stress:
click here to check out Positive Discipline Ninja Tactics: Key Tools to Handle Every Temper Tantrum, Keep Your Cool, and Enjoy Life With Your Young Child.
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