Firmness or Flexibility: which is more important in parenting? (Podcast Episode 225)

Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll all the way down to the bottom of this post and hit the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!

Maybe you have said to yourself,

when you’re watching a parent fail miserably to bring a recalcitrant child under control, “that will NEVER be me. I pride myself on order and discipline in my house!”

Or, maybe you’ve heard snide comments from teachers or relatives about your child “ruling the roost,” and it’s frustrating because you don’t want to be a disciplinarian. That’s not why you had kids, to order them around!

So, which is it? Do you need to be firm? Or do you need to be flexible?

Listen to today’s episode to find out!

For notes on this episode including:

– The answer to this dilemma of flexibility vs. firmness
– The sign-up for the 3 Secrets of Happy Parenting FREE online class, which distills everything I’ve learned into 3 simple lessons for true enjoyment of this parenting life
– Key Links and every back episode of We Turned Out Okay

Go to weturnedoutokay.com/225.

Thank you so much for listening! Continue reading “Firmness or Flexibility: which is more important in parenting? (Podcast Episode 225)”

Give Your Child the Magic of Summer: A Conversation with Summer Camp Director/Sunshine Parenting Podcast Host Audrey Monke (Podcast Episode 224)

To us grown-ups, summer can mean

headaches caused by heat and humidity, too much time spent in air-conditioning, and unwelcome changes in routine.

Also, the endless application of sunscreen on our littles.

But to kids, just being outside can be a revelation. There’s birdsong, and water, and dirt…

Summer is a great time for reconnecting with your child, for truly listening to him or her – for deep, true bonding with this little person you are bringing up.

Does that seem daunting? If you’re not sure how to begin, listen to this episode of We Turned Out Okay!

Today, I am excited to interview Sunshine Parenting podcast host Audrey Monke, who has directed a summer camp for more than 30 years.

In that time Audrey has seen it all: extreme homesickness, parental worries, and, again and again, the life-changing magic of summertime.

We tap into her knowledge of how to make summer great, as Audrey shares THE 3 most important things you can do this summer to capture that magic, to truly enjoy the time you spend with your young child.

For TONS of amazing links that come up in today’s conversation, as well as to join our We Turned Out Okay private Facebook group (I’ve got a big announcement in today’s episode about something new happening in the group!)…

Go to weturnedoutokay.com/224.
Thanks for listening! Continue reading “Give Your Child the Magic of Summer: A Conversation with Summer Camp Director/Sunshine Parenting Podcast Host Audrey Monke (Podcast Episode 224)”

How to Handle Every Temper Tantrum

Sometimes, every parent struggles with a child’s meltdowns and screaming fits.

Here’s what most people do when a tantrum happens:

Kids. Sometimes, it’s a good thing they’re cute.

– They give an ineffective timeout
– They shout at their tantruming child, and then feel awful afterwards
– They do absolutely nothing – and as a result they feel powerless.

Meanwhile, their kid’s still screaming.

 

Eventually, most people conclude “this is just how life is with kids.”

They couldn’t be more wrong!

Yes, temper tantrums happen.

But how you handle them – what you do in the moment while that tantrum is happening – makes ALL the difference.

Read on to discover: how to confidently, calmly handle every temper tantrum.
Feel successful as a parent.
Don’t let public tantrums, and the judginess that comes with them, get you down anymore.
Begin to TRULY enjoy the time you spend with your kids! Continue reading “How to Handle Every Temper Tantrum”

Is Spanking Ever Okay? A Your Child Explained Episode (Podcast Episode 223)

Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll all the way down to the bottom of this post and hit the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!


As you probably did, I got spanked as a kid.

But, probably unlike you, I became an early childhood educator and lesson one was “we never, EVER spank a child.”

Still, it’s tempting, especially if it means stopping a behavior that you cannot stand for one more minute.

So, is it ever okay to spank your child? Do you ever do it?

Today – on We Turned Out Okay’s THIRD birthday! – we dig into why parents spank kids, the lessons a child learns from being spanked, and what other options we parents have.

 

WHY Parents Spank Kids

Not surprisingly, spanking doesn’t happen when your child’s behavior is smooth and easy.

It’s when they balk at what you are telling them to do.

When they drag their feet, whine, nag at a sibling until that sibling retaliates.

Spankings happen when we feel that we have been pushed to the absolute brink – when we feel like we have got no other choice.

Take a listen to this episode if you’ve ever felt like that, especially if you’re not quite sure that spanking is what you should be doing, but you don’t see any other option.

For notes to today’s episode, including:

– A 3-step method you can follow to discipline without spanking
– The sign-up for the 3 Secrets of Happy Parenting FREE online class, which distills everything I’ve learned into 3 simple lessons for true enjoyment of this parenting life
– Key Links and every back episode of We Turned Out Okay

Go to weturnedoutokay.com/223.

Thank you so much for listening! Continue reading “Is Spanking Ever Okay? A Your Child Explained Episode (Podcast Episode 223)”

Top 5 Things Every Parent Should Know about Money (Podcast Episode 222)

Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll all the way down to the bottom of this post and click the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!

Lots of us parents are pretty freaked out by the thought of money,

finances, and all the stuff we don’t understand about it.

Ben (my husband and the producer of our show) and I have spent the last year or so confronting our concerns about money, really looking our finances squarely in the face and conquering our fears…

Through this process, we have become more of a team than we were before! Our goals are aligned, each understands the other’s priorities better than ever, and we work closely together now to make our dreams come true.

That’s why I wanted to go in depth on the subject for you.

I want you to have those same good feelings, and understand that it’s possible to conceive of a great future for your child – and to actually start BUILDING that future.

 

What are the 5 most important things for you to remember, when you’re thinking about finances and raising kids? Listen to today’s episode to find out!

Go to weturnedoutokay.com/222 for notes on today’s 5 key takeaways, and links to every WTOO episode about parenting and money, so you can really go in depth on this topic!

At the website you’ll also find:
– Every back episode of We Turned Out Okay
– The sign-up for our 3 Secrets of Happy Parenting FREE online class
– Links so you can subscribe to the podcast in Apple/iTunes, Spotify, and more

Happy Listening! Continue reading “Top 5 Things Every Parent Should Know about Money (Podcast Episode 222)”

How to become financially free, with Dad and Certified Financial Planner Steven Taylor of coltfinancial.org (Podcast Episode 221)

Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll all the way down to the bottom of this post and hit the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!

Today’s conversation is super special,

because it’s with our personal financial planner, Steven Taylor – the man who has helped Ben and I align our goals and begin truly working together to achieve our dreams.

Like many of the best conversations, ours doesn’t stick strictly to the subject at hand. It starts off with sports and quickly develops into a meaningful conversation about parenting (Steven is Dad to 3-and 2-year-old boys).…

And soon, it’s a full-blown exploration of the best money mindset that parents can have.

Whatever your fears about money, or your approach to financial planning, this conversation will make you feel better.

Thanks so much to Steven for coming on the show, and to you for listening!

Show notes, including lots of great links that came up during our conversation, at weturnedoutokay.com/221

Also there, you’ll find the link to sign up for two cool things happening at our local library:

My workshop on how to handle weeknight chaos with little kids (this coming Monday evening, April 23), and Steven’s workshop on budgeting, though he prefers the term “spending plan,” on Tuesday evening, May 29!

If you can be in Bellingham, Massachusetts for either of these, that would be awesome! Continue reading “How to become financially free, with Dad and Certified Financial Planner Steven Taylor of coltfinancial.org (Podcast Episode 221)”

Tame the Weeknight Chaos Live, In-Person Workshop!

 

Longtime friend-of-the-podcast Janine Halloran, LMHC, and I are super excited to teach this free, live, in-person workshop coming up in just over a week…

If you will be in Bellingham, Massachusetts on April 23, click here to sign up!

Janine has been on We Turned Out Okay several times now, most recently in episode 201, called Helping Kids Manage Even the Biggest Feelings.

We are teaming up to teach parents:
– Simple changes you can make to streamline weeknights
– Concrete, useful tools for the toughest moments

And it’s live, in person!

Hope to see you there!

To bribe… or not to bribe? A Your Child Explained Episode (Podcast Episode 220)

The place where so much bribery happens.

Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll down to the bottom of this post and hit the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!

If we’re being honest, who among us has NOT bribed a kid? (Listen to this episode to hear about how we potty trained our youngest… using entire donuts as bribes.)

But is there a better way?

Something we could do to change our child’s behavior from bad to good?

Something that would stop us feeling like we’re being emotionally blackmailed by our kids?

Listen to today’s episode to understand exactly WHY we parents resort to bribery – when it’s most likely to happen – and for 3 things we can do instead!

Read more about bribery…
Find every back episode of the We Turned Out Okay podcast…
Sign up for the 3 Secrets of Happy Parenting Class…

All at weturnedoutokay.com/220.

Happy listening! Continue reading “To bribe… or not to bribe? A Your Child Explained Episode (Podcast Episode 220)”

The 2 Most Dangerous Words in a Parent’s Vocabulary (Podcast Episode 219)

Kids. Sometimes, it’s a good thing they’re cute.

Today’s podcast episode shares one simple change you can make that will affect how your child behaves.

Read on, and listen to today’s episode, to learn this simple change yourself and start using it to truly enjoy the time you spend with your kids!

Working with parents of young children,

one phrase comes up again and again – one really dangerous phrase.

It’s dangerous because it perpetuates bad behavior from our kids, which none of us want… Yet, it is really hard not to use it.

You probably use this phrase yourself; I know I have!

Here’s the thing: we do not want to ASK our kids “would you like to stop hitting your sister now?”

Instead, we want them to simply STOP hitting their sister.

(Or whatever thing they’re doing right now that is potentially harmful/driving us crazy/making us question our life choices : )

Today I share:
– Exactly what the two most dangerous words in a parent’s vocabulary are
– Why these words get used so often
What you can say instead for good behavior from your child

Today’s episode helps you get past the bad behavior so you can fulfill your ultimate goal of truly enjoying family time!

 

Read more about these two dangerous words and what to say instead…
Find every back episode of the We Turned Out Okay podcast…
Sign up for the 3 Secrets of Happy Parenting Class…
All at weturnedoutokay.com/219.

Happy listening! Continue reading “The 2 Most Dangerous Words in a Parent’s Vocabulary (Podcast Episode 219)”

Boring Books are Dangerous – A Conversation with Ashia Ray of booksforlittles.com (Podcast Episode 218)

Welcome! To listen to today’s episode, scroll all the way down to the bottom of this post and hit the triangular “play” button. Enjoy the show!

Did you ever wish that you could find just the right book to help your child understand some large issue that you’re just not sure how to talk about?

Then today’s episode is for you – my guest Ashia Ray runs booksforlittles.com, a website dedicated to helping parents find great books, on every subject.

Listen to find out:
– How to use books to make your parenting life easier and better
– When a book is “age-appropriate”
– Why boring books are dangerous

Read about Ashia’s two most important takeaways, and find links to lots of books and other resources at weturnedoutokay.com/218!

 

3 Secrets of Happy Parenting:

If you’re dreading, rather than enjoying, the time you spend with your young child, take my free online 3 Secrets of Happy Parenting Course.

You’ll learn:
– How to change your child’s behavior from bad to good… FAST
– The opportunities technology and screen time offer to change your family dynamic
– What One Quality ALL Happy Parents Share

Learn these 3 Secrets in a FREE, live, online class.
Click the button below for details and to sign up: Click Here for the 3 Secrets of Happy Parenting Class

 

 

Ashia’s Two Most Important Takeaways

Good literature for children – and there’s a lot of it fortunately – can help you accomplish two key things:
1) These books make it easier to talk about hard topics
2) These books make it possible to reclaim your time

 

Key Links

Click here for episode 194, my conversation with Joshilyn Jackson, New York Times best-selling author of (among other things) The Almost Sisters, my favorite book of 2017.

Click here for episode 191, my conversation with my son Jason in which we discuss helping kids cope with fears – and he accuses me of being Pollyanna-ish (I’ll let you decide for yourself if he is right : )

Click here for Amy Herman’s wonderful book Visual Intelligence… I really want to have Amy on the show. This book comes up a lot on We Turned Out Okay.

Click here for Brad Meltzer’s book series, Ordinary People Change The World

 

Important WTOO Links

If you need practical advice to deal with your child’s bad behavior, check out my book.
It’s called Positive Discipline Ninja Tactics, and I wrote it especially to help parents handle kids’ tough behavior, because parents need to eliminate the bad before they can be happy at home.
It’s available in Amazon, but since you’re here – since you took the time to come visit weturnedoutokay.com – I want to give you a better deal than Amazon.
Click here for details on Positive Discipline Ninja Tactics!

If you’re seeing aggressive behavior, or sadness, or passivity in your child, the Ninja Parenting Community helps.
It’s where I help parents just like you figure out how to handle all the tough stuff our kids throw at us.
Click here to learn more about the community!

Join the private WTOO Facebook group… Click here!

Click here to check out We Turned Out Okay’s How-to Videos, to learn about how to help your kids eat more fruits and vegetables, how to help them learn to read, and more!

If you love the show, please rate and review us in Apple Podcasts… That’s how so many people find us. Click here to rate/review, and thanks so much!